Day 1879, new time.

We are moving to a new house

it will be

for a while

a bright spot

in our life

~

but time

it looks to go forwards

but it is just

slowly

showing you all that is new

till it isn’t

Day 1877, no littering.

There was still

something left of you

when you hit the ground

~

everything you once was

spilled out 

you were no more

an empty vessel

~

you made a mess

and I wanted to leave you

but I picked you up

and threw you away

Day 1876, open a door.

I sometimes open a door

just to see what’s inside

Nochrisis

I think it was somewhere in my early twenties that I for the first time red something of/about Jiddu Krishnamurti. I think I got to him through my interest, back then, in Annie Besant, she’s quite a character, though she has some strange religious ideas. Krishnamurti is for me someone that represents both an eastern and western approach to philosophy. I often recommend people that are interested in life’s question and/or struggling with these questions to read some Buddhist texts. When you read them superficially, they can often uplift you and help you to relativize your problems. If they like reading these Buddhist texts I will make sure that they hop over to Krishnamurti before they go to deep into Buddhism, because at the end Buddhism is not much more than a doctrinal religion like Christendom or Islam, a “do this, than that will happen” religion.

Krishnamurti is a critical thinker with a deep and personal history with eastern philosophy, religion and mysticism. I see him as a good bridge to western philosophy when your interest is mainly eastern philosophy. A lot of western, mainly young people, gravitate to eastern ideas because western ideas seem to them “dirty” and the cause of…I don’t really understand this, as if there are no “problems” in the east, but a bigger problem is that these people that are looking for a solution…are looking for a solution. They look for some kind of overarching system that would solve their problems, as if you are not responsible for that yourself. This is in short, the philosophy of Krishnamurti and a good gateway to western philosophy, a philosophy that is more rooted in critical thinking, questioning why and not telling how.

 

“You know, if we understand one question rightly, all questions are answered. But we don’t know how to ask the right question. To ask the right question demands a great deal of intelligence and sensitivity. Here is a question, a fundamental question: is life a torture? It is, as it is; and man has lived in this torture centuries upon centuries, from ancient history to the present day, in agony, in despair, in sorrow; and he doesn’t find a way out of it. Therefore he invents gods, churches, all the rituals, and all that nonsense, or he escapes in different ways. What we are trying to do, during all these discussions and talks here, is to see if we cannot radically bring about a transformation of the mind, not accept things as they are, nor revolt against them. Revolt doesn’t answer a thing. You must understand it, go into it, examine it, give your heart and your mind, with everything that you have, to find out a way of living differently. That depends on you, and not on someone else, because in this there is no teacher, no pupil; there is no leader; there is no guru; there is no Master, no savior. You yourself are the teacher and the pupil; you are the Master; you are the guru; you are the leader; you are everything. And to understand is to transform what is.

I think that will be enough, won’t it?”

Jiddu Krishnamurti

Day 1875, curiosity.

You know where I am

I told you a thousand times

~

but maybe the words I speak

the order they are in

the meaning I give them

are pointless

and empty for you

~

but you still know where I am

you could come by

and ask

what I mean

~

Or don’t you want to know?

Day 1874, seeing doubt.

The door stared at me in silence

as if it didn’t want to disturb me

in my hesitation

~

I realized

that I shouldn’t open a door

that looks at me

Day 1871, locket door.

I see the door

It blends with the rest that is real

what’s inside is locked away and nearby

it will never be seen

but I know, there is a door.

 

“Of whom and of what can I say: “I know that”! This heart within me I can feel, and I judge that it exists. This world I can touch, and I likewise judge that it exists. There ends all my knowledge, and the rest is construction. For if I try to seize this self of which I feel sure, if I try to define and to summarize it, it is nothing but water slipping through my fingers. I can sketch one by one all the aspects it is able to assume, all those likewise that have been attributed to it, this upbringing, this origin, this ardor or these silences, this nobility or this vileness. But aspects cannot be added up. This very heart which is mine will forever remain indefinable to me. Between the certainty I have of my existence and the content I try to give to that assurance the gap will never be filled.”

Albert Camus

Day 1870, no shadows.

I like to climb higher

not to reach a better place

but to see shorter shadows

 

We have our secrets and quiet conversations in the shadows, the things we don’t want to show in the light of day. Our shadows get shorter, the higher we climb (literally and hopefully figuratively), not that this shadow-less world takes away the secrets and bad habits we have, they are just clear to see for all. It’s not a better place per se, but at least a more honest one.

It is off course easy to imagine what would happen in a world where everybody speaks there mind, and where we can see unfiltered, what’s going on between companies and governments. It would be chaos, specially in the beginning, but on the other hand…we cannot stay mad forever at everybody just because they speak their mind…It is a a nice thought experiment. What would you think, would happen?

Day 1869, I wont.

I was standing in the middle of the street

the sun was not up

the clouds reflected just enough

and silence closed her eyes for one more time

~

out of wont

I walked away

to the side

where I belong

~

It still felt wrong

while all alone

to stand still

where normally

I don’t

Day 1868, windows.

Sometimes in life

you look trough a small window

and the world appears

easier to digest

~

other times you open your eyes

and stand in front

of a large window

and the world appears

Day 1867, my two walls.

When you approach me

and want to get in

~

you can choose the nice door

easy to open

it is in

the unseemly wall

~

or take the other

the one in the nice

bright colored wall

but this door is old

and is probably not opened

for a very long time

Day 1866, searching.

For this

I have to go up

while ignoring

~

the monolithic structure

I have to scale

~

so when I am there

I can search

while opening doors

for clues

to my past

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