Does all this strife and talk, all these opinions and countless books, lead to anything? Is there progress? Let’s take our healthcare as an example, something so much more advanced than even 60 years ago, let alone 50000 years ago.

It’s safe to assume that we are kept alive longer because of modern medical advances, but it’s harder to say that we live healthier or significantly longer because of it. People also lived to eighty or older in the Middle Ages, just not as many; the average lifespan was much lower because a large percentage of children never reached adulthood.

Some say that hunter-gatherers were healthier because they had a more varied diet; they probably ate more nutritionally than most of us do now, but they also died earlier from diseases we can now easily treat. It seems that the constant search for answers has benefited our health; we eat less varied, but live longer because of our knowledge.

But living healthily is one thing; for most, it’s important, but many accept life as it is and are blessed with a positive attitude. Ignorance can also be a blessing. The loss of your health, a newborn, or a brother was also felt 50000 years ago, and the feeling of grief probably wasn’t much different from what we would feel today. However, for them, it was primarily unexplained, and the idea of living healthier and eating less red meat would never have come up. They probably worried about why they died, but not in a way that we can imagine, though they imagine in the same way.

I believe it’s essential for a percentage of the smartest people to research how diseases work and how we can prevent and cure them, not because it will make us happier, but because we are capable of doing so. This “because we can do it” research is important in many fields, but you can probably think of some areas where it is not.

So, strife and talk are important, but only in themselves, not because there’s a specific goal we can reach. In other words, progress can occur on the edges of our existence, but our fundamental experience will stay the same.

For many years, I’ve wanted to write a book. I started, had many ideas, but soon my motivation moved on. The motivation I need is the belief that what I write makes a difference, either for the people who read it or in society. These goals seem too lofty because even highly skilled, well-known writers accomplish little; there has never been a book with ‘The answers,’ otherwise we would all know about it. I write daily on my blog, but I only reach a handful of people. This writing is more of a personal exercise and challenge rather than a serious effort to reach anyone, let alone change the world.

One reason my writing needs to be meaningful is because there are already too many opinions about life, how it works, and why it exists. The problem is that too many people are overly confident in the truth of their own views. I don’t even trust most of my own opinions, and I try to live my life so that each step I take is one into the unknown. And my character makes this harder; I like to cling to my current views and even know how to sell, even to myself, all the while knowing that it all means very little.

In that sense, I am like a scientist, defending my theories while knowing that only the knowledge I have just gathered keeps this entire structure afloat. One new finding or contradiction, and it might collapse.

I live this life in my job as a manager. Answering questions with responses that I deliver like a mediocre stage performer, convincing enough when seen from the balcony, and with a bit of luck, it persuades the people in the front row, but my fellow performers see right through me. It is not all a lie, of course, some buttons have to be pressed at the right time, or rules that we agreed on have to be followed without debate, but an overconfident manager is never a good manager in my book.

Imagine a world where all managers, politicians, and religious leaders would say, ‘I don’t know,’ more than convey their convictions. Maybe we should rule more by committee; it might take longer, but what is the rush? Who has ever decided that we should get there sooner rather than later?