I pretend that all my memories
and futures
are captured
ordered at equal distances 
and lined up into infinity

the neatness
keeps me calm

I see what moves me
but what drives me

I sometimes wonder
If your old measurement
scale 
can still be used

At the end of the day
we have fished for all day
just enough for today

and tomorrow 
we fish for tomorrow
like we did yesterday 
for yesterday

I don’t know why
I want to feel my whole life
like a ball in my hand

as if this will make it real

but there is a hard line
between reality
and me

Here a forest begins
a few trees and light
behind a darkness
one that I feel

its caling 
temting
do I answer

There once was a light in my room
but I don’t remember where the switch was
let alone how it looked 

I am still in that room 

I see you as support
and myself in a sense
also

I see all of this
but it feels like
there has to be more 
where I walk

I was still able to hear you
walking away
but my words 
echoed 
unspoken 
in the space between us

The river slowly moves the boat
I move my fingers through the water
and pretend it's me
moving the boat

somewhere in the distance
I hear the waterfall
It should still be far away

but what do I know 
what that would sound like